Many nights have been filled with prayer, worry and self-doubt. Probably at this point you are thinking I am worried about becoming a mom. However, being a mom is all I have ever wanted. Ever. I only ever thought of career paths because I felt I had to.
Well, now that my due date has changed again, I worry that I shouldn't go back to college this semester. I was given a great opportunity to go back to MSU, but now my due date has our son slated to come on Dec. 1. That would be two weeks before finals.
In a way I feel like the only reason I would be going to school is because that is what you do in 2016. What if I want to be a stay at home mom who raises her children instead of a babysitter or a teacher? I know that I would need a source of income and I am working on figuring that out, but I keep thinking that I am not really going to school for me. I think I'm going for my family and my husband's family.
Today if you don't have a degree, you are viewed as a disappointment. It's so sad for those who have no interest or desire to go to college. My mom will always point out that I loved school, which is true. I do love learning and socializing with teachers and students.
In the end I think that is why I have been sad about not attending school. I like the events and socialization. I am my father's daughter in that I am a social butterfly, but what if I just want to be a mom. Do I have to have a $70,000 degree in order to be a mother?
Also, I hate that so many people turn up their noses at me for 'wasting my life away.' But not a moment would be wasted in raising my son. Not one.
At this point, I am just hoping that I can find a way to be a stay at home mother. When there is a will, there is a way, right?
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